Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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