Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Randomize
