yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Randomize
