oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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