I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Randomize
