you have to choose: penises or morals?
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
