I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
