Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Randomize
