i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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