she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize
