I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Randomize
