why do cheetos always look like penises
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
