ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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