So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Randomize
