i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Blood and glitter go together right?
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
