Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
