i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize
