I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
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