The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
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