This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
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