your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
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