fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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