im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
