In the future we'll all be gay
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
It's blow job season.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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