I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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