Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize