Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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