He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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