it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Randomize