So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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