chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Let's paint friendship bongs
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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