When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
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