May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
