It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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