I hate all girls vehemently.
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
i was born a porn star she said
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
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