im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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