I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
