So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
