Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Eric just called. Says he's trapped in a cul de sac because the road disappeared. Wants me to tell him what street has the bushes that whisper sweet nothings into you ear and the wobbling purple pokemon. Oh, and a "bigger and better" penis is growing out of his belly button. He took shrooms by the way.
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize