Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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