:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize