and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
