so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Randomize
