Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
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