i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize