I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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