you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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