I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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