on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
