people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Liz is crying about burritos again.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
